breastfeeding guilt

So I have an online mothers group full of wonderful, strong women. There is around 90 or so in the group with half of them active, the group originated from a website called bub hub and it was a group of pregnant ladies all due in the same month. We migrated to facebook and now that we have all had our babies the group has transformed into a place for us all to vent or ask questions or just share news.

One thing that has always been constant is the women that have had trouble breastfeeding and the guilt that they feel over it. I can't begin to understand how they feel but I can share my thoughts & feelings on it all.

You often hear that breastfeeding is the best for the baby, it is natural and the way we are "supposed" to do things. Breastmilk is full of natural goodness for babies, especially colostrum in the first few weeks of life. Colostrum has very high protein levels and also helps babies pass bowel moments. Then when mature breastmilk is made it contains the right amount of fats and nutrients to nourish the growing baby. It's all happy and perfect and healthy and wonderful.

Now think about the pressure that new mums are under to do everything "right", to be able to function with the lack of sleep, the constant visitors, the pressure to keep up appearances and of course the pressure to breastfeed. Then add people sticking their noses in, family, friends, healthcare nurses and even random members of the public at the shops, it's enough to send a women batty.

The reality is not all women can breastfeed and even then not all women want to breastfeed. I was trying to find some information on the inability to feed and there is not a whole lot out there. There is however a lot on ways to 'correct' the milk supply, worded in ways that makes the mother sound like she is broken. In a world of post natal depression what makes these nurses think it's a good idea to force new mothers into something that they can't do? their babies are screaming for food, just let them do what they need to. Once the new mum has switched to formula life usually settles down, bub stops screaming everyone gets more sleep.

We need to remove the guilt associated with formula feeding, we need to support these mums. Where are the pamphlets to help those who can't bf but really wanted to? There is not enough help for them and it's not good enough. The important thing that we need to remember here is that as long as the baby is loved, fed and looked after does it really matter? and as long as mum is feeling o.k and not stressed out over the breastfeeding pressure then they will bond a whole lot more in a relaxed environment.

Let the mother do what feels right, give her the support she needs and allow her to chose what's best for her and her baby because everyone has a story and their own struggles and reasons for doing what they do.

gotta breathe

I guess you could look at xmas being a positive thing, I mean it is supposed to be about family and gifts and food and such. Harley is even getting into the spirit a little by collecting xmas specials to watch with Lex leading up to the big day and I am thinking I might like to go for a drive and check out the lights around town. I think I might bring some stuff to eat at my Aunties place for xmas day lunch, I love roast veggies but maybe something extra might be nice for us vegetarian folk to munch on. I used to make these really great soysage rolls so I am thinking I might try and make little pies in the muffin tray and see how they turn out, If they turn out ok I will probs post the recipe in case you feel like making some of your own vegetarian muffin pies.

I have started to get fit, well I've been on this process since having Fable and so far lost 15kg but am looking to loose another 5 or so. This week I lost 800g which I was really pumped about because I'm finally under 85 kilos. I haven't been under 85 for about 6 years so it put a smile on my face. Also I need to start measuring myself so I don't get all obsessive about what the scales are telling me. It's easy to do I and don't think it's all that healthy to just focus on numbers.

I also got tickets to one of my all time fave bands thanks to my hubby and my dad who conspired. I'm glad they did because I was feeling uber down about a lot of stuff that day so a Sublime ticket and friend visits made me feel like myself again.

I am planning on using this space for more interesting things but at the moment this is all I can muster, and my little bubbah is ready for a snooze so it's time for me to depart and do the walk and rock.

luh you

so this is blogging

ok so i have a blog now, all it took really was a good friend tweeting "do itt" at me. So really it didn't take much, I don't think i have a whole lot to say but who knows, i might just surprise myself. Currently I have a small child in my lap, the smallest in my family, a little monkey named Fable. She is only ten weeks old but at this point I can already tell she is going to be a chatty mischief maker. From the moment she was born she started babbling and I mean that in a literal sense. After she finished crying she started chatting, it was amazing. As for the cheeky part well I just changed her nappy and sat down with her for a cuddle and her response? to fill the nappy and then giggle. Something tells me if this is her at ten weeks then her at 2 or 3 is going to be an interesting experience.

I have been putting off going for a walk tonight, it looks like it's going to rain. I probably could have gone to the shops and back by now but instead i have been looking to check for rain...it hasn't rained yet. I tend to do this a lot, it's like I am afraid of getting rained on with Fable, She'd be in her ergo and I'd take a brolly so really what's the issue? possibly my weird brain. Brolly is a great word it reminds me of swimming the other day when my hubby Harley said he needed to find his swimming trunks and I laughed at him for being so old fashioned, but then i use the word "brolly" in a sentence like an old lady.

Well I am off to go for that walk, or check to see if it's raining or if it's raining stay home and complain that i don't have juice to drink.

Luh you